The first of hurdles

Sometimes life is easy. Sometimes you wish it were easy and sometimes you wonder...what is easy?

You must forgive me...I didn't realize (until I reread it) that my last post was a bit misleading. Yes, I did go to court, but no it wasn't to decide my ultimate fate for custody. That judgement is yet to come. This one was about the domestic violence restraining order.

Until Wednesday, my restraining order was tempory. I needed to have a judge order a permanent one. I found out Tuesday night that a permanent order is set for 3 years, but I can always change/drop it later if I want to. MB should have been there (it would have looked better for his case), but he wasn't.

Let me tell you, court is a whole nother world! I haven't felt that small since I shoved the tailpipe up my parents car in a joy riding accident in high school and I had to go with them to pick it up. My lawyer thought it would be an open and shut thing, but I did end up having to testify. I get a horrible feeling that this is the begining of a long drawn out expensive nightmare.

So the judge granted the permanent restraining order and said MB will have to take a drug/alcohol evaluation. The judge took his time to review the case and shook his head saying that he believed that the risk to the children was to great and MB will not be allowed visitation until he can resolve his issues with dependancy. He asked me questions about the type of knife MB had and how the girls feel. I think the question was worded like this, Do the children want to see their father?" I wasn't sure how to answer this question, so I said, "I told the court that MB has been a good father up until the last year." Later when asked about his drinking I added that he seems to be getting more violent with each drinking binge. He asked me straight out, "Do you believe [MB] is an alcoholic?" Under oath, I answered, "Yes."

Mediation is set for June 21st and then we go back to a judge on July 5th. I think (but not sure) if that is to decide custody and visitation...if any.

*MB- I'm still very sorry that it had to be this way. Please get well. Your kids don't hate you. I know this will be a rough father's day for you. Perhaps next year will be better.