Awake

Why am I still awake?
It's 12:30 AM...

I went rollar skating tonight. My girls take after me. Like fish in water...I think we were born with wheels on our feet...fins? No, maybe skies??

We are a cordinated bunch.
I zipped along, whizzing past all the fallen teens.
It wasn't until AFTER we left the building that I fell. I tripped on a juniper root and fell into the bushes. I must have looked drunk!
I smell like pine. Fresh...?

When Megan figured out that she could combine her love of dance with skating...WHOAWEEE!!! She had moves. Katie almost died of embarresment.

I'm teaching her how to spin and skate backwards.

Well- I guess that's all I have to say. Hardly needed to say that. But I did.
What was left unsaid,
remains in my head;
blood soaked and stained
in the color red.

Yuck. Now that's just gross.
Good-Nite All.

"Ain't nothin to it, but to do it!"

I had a nice long post here, but blogger dumped it and only held onto the title!!!

I'll have to remember it later...no time now!

Okay- Here's the jist of it...

Started the floor yesterday, didn't finish because Thea didn't answer her phone. I dropped my project, grabbed a DVD and a bottle of wine and headed for her house.

She had a bad Migraine.
I stayed with her for 2 1/2 hours and picked up her kids from the bus stop.
Helped the boys get ready for baseball.
Took my girls to AWANA, and got back to the floor with the help of my wonderful husband.

I hope to finish it this morning.

"Ain't nothin to it, but to do it." A quote from my daddy.

With the screen.

Almost done. I have some clean up work to do on the inside...two pieces of wood to attach on the bottom...give the whole thing another coat of white paint...seal the grout...and it's done. I also plan on building bookshelves to go on each side. Now back to the floor.

Do what ya gotta do

I'm going out with Thea today.

I need a day off, though I really want to finish the job!!

Yesterday, I went shopping (must eat...),
did laundry (must wear something...)
and sanded the living room floor.

It's ready for flooring. I bought cherry laminate.
I'm not usually big on laminate (I'd rather go for the real thing),
but in the kitchen where we put down real brazilian cherry, it scratches easily. Looks gorgeous! But with kids running all around (mine and the neighborhood kids) I need something durable. I can't see how laminate is going to be durable...it's so thin, but everyone says it is.

Okay, we'll see.

Later...right now I need some time with a friend.
I'll stress out later.

UPDATE: Darn. I just talked to Thea. She's backing out of therapy today. Not like her. She's depressed. I heard it in her voice last week and now she wants to just "crawl back into bed".
Hmmm. What's a good friend to do?

Child Smiles Are Joy To Me

My girls are the best. Sure, they can be difficult sometimes...

but when I see their beautiful smiles, radiating with absolute joy, shining in the fresh new morning...I am content.
Nothing else matters.

They are blessings I count daily. Blessings I am truly thankful for.
Those smiles...even if only for a second, pick me up...give me strength.

I know what I am and what I am not.

I am brave.
I am willing.
I am focused on the task.

I am not a multi-tasker.
I am not a 'supermom'.
I am not a perfectionist.

I am willing to let things slide, even though I know it will drive me crazy later. Like piled up laundry, no food in the house and forgotten field trip permission forms.
All for the sake of the PROJECT!!
But I will put off the project for a day (if I absolutely have to) to play catch up.
It is my nature.
I have tunnel vision. I can't do 10 things at once. I don't know how people can, but I admire the ones who somehow manage it.

I am drained.
This morning, Megan smiled at me. She is usually very difficult to wake up, but today she got right up and did everything without me bugging her...(to those of you who don't have kids in school yet, you have NO idea how wonderful this is!!).
Katie played a song in the car that made me smile. I can't stand Shania Twain, but for some weird reason...'UP UP UP' hit me just in the right place...the funny bone.

I laughed and I smiled.
I reminded myself...happiness is a choice. Let's be happy.
I can't remember when I last smiled like that.
Have I really been that down the past few days??
I guess I have.
Yesterday I threw a fit because I couldn't find my nail set... (a tool to drive finishing nails just below the surface)
I also ate a brownie from the deli (knowing it had milk in it) as a sort of lashing out rebellion. I paid for it in the way of a major side cramp.

Mad, sad, frustrated...kind of goes with the remodeling territory.
Like the upset golfer who throws a club across the green, I've been the do-it-yourselfer wanting to hurl a hammer into the ocean.

Somehow all the anger melted away when I saw their smiles.
Bright sunny smiles.
Man, I love my kids!!

Quietness of the Inner Self

In the center,

the middle me

I sit and wonder

what could be

the color red

shines so bright

carefully choosen

to be my light

these words of mine

are makes of art

but you decide

which way to part

dance they do

I'll catch your stare

place them in

my long blonde hair

what is here

in the center of light?

it is peace

and I am right.

I don't know if I've shared this poem yet.

Honestly, I don't remember. It does, however, reflect my mood today.

Peaceful and content.

GRASS!!

Our neighbors love us...we improved their property value!
You just can't appreciate a yard until you realize what it takes to get one.

I did this area this morning...all it needs now is a nice swinging bench seat! If you look beyond the driveway, you'll see more work I have to do...paint the fence, build an arbor, plants some flowers...oh, it never ends!

I took this picture in the exact same spot as my before picture. We still have some more work to do...ie-(move the pallets), add shredded bark and a few more plants... but WOW, what a difference!

To fully appreciate our nearly 2 years of HARD work...you must see this "before" picture.

Time Out!... Jog-a-thon sunburn.

Yesterday we finished laying out the sod. 89 rolls (that's 800plus sq. ft.) wasn't enough. We'll have to order 18 more rolls.

It's very difficult to stop your life for these home improvement projects. It's my nature to plow right through and hardly take a breath. I focus all my thoughts onto my project. Therefore the dishes and laundry pile up and kids? Oh yeah...I have kids!

Yesterday our school had it's annual jog-a-thon to raise money for various campus necessities. Like new swings and computers. I'm all for that!
Besides I love the jog-a-thon. BEST fundraiser ever!
My daughter, Megan, loves it too. She is a born runner. She's been talking about it all week and has been wearing good shoes to practice at recess. (self trainer...that's my girl!)
Last year she ran 34 laps.
Yesterday she ran 41 laps. Parents kept coming up to me to say how impressed they were with her.
I know...trust me, I've got stories!! She has scared me half to death a few times with her speed.
(ahhemm...running in the street)

I was the DJ. The school has great speakers, but you'd never know it, cause they hooked them up to a portable cd player. I didn't know I was going to have this job, but luckily I had my ipod with me. I disconnected their player and plugged in my itunes. Worked like a charm!
I rocked the field for over an hour.
Katie thought it was so cool because she could request songs. Luckily we share taste in music, so I already knew which songs were appropriate.
The sun was beating down at first, but then got cloudy. I was wearing a tank top with my running shorts/shoes. I was planning on running with the kids. I always do, but not this time :(
If I would have known the event was going to depended on my ipod, I would have made up a kicking playlist and just let it run. Instead I scrambled through my library searching for just the right song the entire time. O'well. Next year my friends....next year!!

I did start off with "Where are we runnin" by Lenny Kravitz (They loved that!)
oh yeah...I got one hell of a sunburn. Wasn't expecting that!

Getting closer! I worked 10 hours straight yesterday to make it this far. Today I will work in the grout and maybe start piecing together the mantle. OUTSIDE UPDATE- Sod is here! Grass is a welcome sight. Time to start rolling it out. Can she do it folks?

A Very Slow Process

It's A Process (ignore the water spots, I need a new camera)

My First Fender Bender

Are you like me?
Do you usually play your music so loud just so you can feel like your the singer?
Do you hit the power button off when you have a lot on your mind?
Do you have full conversations with yourself in the silence only to realize you've said the same thing 3 times?

I do...and yesterday I had a lot to say to myself.
Specifically some nice choice words that I don't like to say, but hey, there's nobody around to hear them except me. They're in my head anyway. Why not yell them in the car?
Thanks to cells phones, it doesn't look strange at all anymore to see someone in their car talking to nobody. We just think...they must be on a speaker phone or a headset. Except she's yelling, what a jerk!

How about these words for starters...
Stupid Idiot
Dumb Sh*t
Jerk
blanket-e-blank-blank-blank

I hate shopping. I don't think I'll ever do it again.

I'm such a liar. A very bad liar.

Okay- here's the thing...Yesterday

My day had already been a storm of highs and lows when I hit a car. No, not a car...a Lincoln Navigator! Damn- how did I not see that?!?! It's way bigger than my little trooper.

I hit her? Or did she hit me? That will be the question.
We were both backing out of our parking spots. My drivers side rear bumper hit her passenger side rear bumper. She gets out, brushes her hand across the damage and says "Jesus Christ!"
I think...GREAT!
"It's okay, you don't have to say that." I said, putting my hand on her shoulder.
It's just a stratch anyway. It's not like I tore the thing apart.
I think her vehicle was new.
Luckily that was as mad as she got. She never said it was my fault or hers. Neither of us knew exactly what to do, so we did what good wives do...we called our husbands. I knew mine would not be available. He's in Gems training.
So I called my insurance.
They told me to call the police.
The police told me to exchange information. (I knew that.)
5 minutes later we were both saying "Thank you and sorry".
Why do we say thank you? yeah, thank you for hitting my car and complicating my life! No...more like "sorry I made your day suck and thank you for not being a jerk."

Horoscope hits the nail on the head.

"Sometimes you just have to act on instinct, and now is one of those times."

This is my horoscope for today. I don't hold much truth in such things, but I think they're fun. Just like a fortune cookie, it's so general that anybody can apply these "tiny advices" to their lives.

Funny, how they somtimes seem to be right on.

I was up until midnight last night trying to figure out my fireplace mantle. I laid it all out on the floor like a jigsaw puzzle. I'm a visual learner...if I can't picture it in my mind, I have to draw it on paper or work it out with blocks. That helped.
However, it means another trip to the store...another day wasted.

On a good note...Sod is being delivered this Thursday. I had a nightmare that a tornado came through and made a mess of our newly landscaped front yard. My ambitions have been soaring lately, and it feels like a bit of my steam is escaping. I feel overwhelmed and somewhat scared that I'm going to screw it all up, but heck if I'm going to let that stop me!

I'm just too stubborn for that.
And fear is just a waste of time.

A New Shipment of Men From Mars!

I don't know how to write this post without sounding extremely conceited, but I'll try...because it's funny, scary, pathetic and typical of some men.


True story #1.
A cute, young blonde woman goes into a home improvement store to buy a mantle for her fireplace. There are premade kits designed to be installed against a flat wall. Her fireplace already has bricks and a harth. She could build the mantle herself, but would like to buy it premade to save time. She drifts along the isle, studying all her options.
While she is there a little boy (about 2 yrs old) walks up next to her, reaching down to pick up a shelf bracket. His father calls to him..."hey, you found it (boys name), next to the pretty girl!"
She pretends she didn't hear that.
He looks down at the ring on her finger and says.."you can't be married!"
"Yes, I am."
He presses on, asking her which bracket would look better in his newly remodeled kitchen with black granite countertops...a rental property, he adds.
She politely offers her opinion then quickly shifts her focus back on fireplace mantles.
He begins to leave, but the boy lags behind.
"I know you want to stay with the lovely lady... we're lookin for a new mommy, but it's time to go!"
She keeps her head down, afraid to make eye contact. Finally he's gone.
She avoids him like a disease throughout the rest of the store.

True Story #2
The same cute young blonde woman goes into another home improvement store, this time to find tile. She is having trouble deciding between slate (rustic) and granite (modern).
It's a nice sunny Sunday afternoon and the place is packed with motivated do-it-yourselfers.
After a nice conversation with an older man about why his wife makes all their decorating decisions, it's back to... this one? or that one?
Twice a young Asian employee walks by. On the third time he stops and asks if she needs help.
"No, I'm just trying to find the right one."
He sits down on a pallet of cement board and waits.
Feeling a bit uncomfortable, she reaches down and picks up a grey tile. "Does this look green to you?" she askes him.
"Is green your favorite color?" (She is wearing a green t-shirt).
"No, actually it's red." She places the tile back down, turns around and catches him glancing at her butt.
Oh jeez.
Luckily someone else came up to ask him a question. He left, only to find her later in the checkout stand. "That doesn't look like slate!"
"Uh, no. The slate was nice, but to rough."
"Okay then- have fun."

True Story #3.
With her suv loaded down with wood, paint and tile, the cute young woman cringes at the sight that her car is almost out of gas. Even though she's tired and just wants to go home, she'll have to make another stop. Shopping has taken a toll.
She pulls up next to a pump at the station with her windows rolled down and pops the gas tank lid. The usual routine.
Only this time she feels a pair of eyes watching her. There is a man leaning up against his truck on the other side of the pump. She guesses he has nothing better to do than watch her wash bugs off the windshield.
When her tank is full, she tears off the receipt and climbs back into the drivers seat. Turning over the engine, her music overpowers the muffled radio station coming from some outdoor speakers.
Before she leaves she looks up at the man. He smiles. She smiles back. He begins to say something, but she can't hear him. She turns down her music and yells "What?"
"Is your name Jody?"
"Uh, no."
"What are ya doin tonight?"
Stunned she thinks...I don't believe this, now I'm getting asked out!
Frustrated she yells back "MARRIED!"
With a wide open grin, he replies "Okay then, have fun"


All this happened to me yesterday.
Do I have the words "F**k Me" written across my forehead?

Happy Birthday To Duf!!!

I hate to miss someone's birthday, so thank you to Panda for posting all those funny birthday quotes!

Duf it is the day
you came into the world
with your brother
at your side
to help and be your guide.
I do not really know you
yet I like to think I do

my friend across the miles

between the oceans, blue

Today I say...
scream your name
into the wind
it carries joy

and makes you grin.

Never mind the wrinkles

that gather at your sight

aging has no right
to wither at your soul
give a little wink
and tell them not to go
the years are very precious
each holds a pleasent prize
keep them in a treasure box
each morning when you rise.

Going to bed sore.

Last night I crawled into bed around 11 with a smile on my face. That's late for me, but I didn't mind. I had one of those "boy, I got a lot done today..." feelings.

Yesterday I preped the living room (took an hour) then got to the real work. Scrapped the acoustic ceiling, primed and painted it. Michael and I removed the carpet and set up the garage to look more like our living room. funny. Might as well have some fun while the furniture is outside anyway.

Why bring the outside in when you can bring the inside out? As long as I don't leave the couch sitting on the front porch, it's all good. I won't look like a back country hick.

Today I'm finishing what I started the other day...the rock fireplace will tumble!
Tomorrow...shift gears back to the landscaping out front. DIRT! Then off to Lotus Park for Katie's soccer practice. Oh yeah...she made the select girls team!!! Congrats Katie!
Sunday...Church maybe...then off to Roseville to shop at my favorite home store...Lowe's.
Let's see...Slate tiles, mantle, tile adhesive, grout, wall paint, wood flooring, baseboards, corner round...what else? Oh yeah- the furniture store. We need a new sofa.

I don't think I can fit all that in my trooper.

A little closer to the house. My girls love to jump from rock to rock and climb the trees. The little monkeys!

The back...uhm, yard? I haven't a clue where our property line is...somewhere way down this hill. Michael knows, he's walked it...I've already had my share of snakes, thank you very much!

Love to see it go!

70's Rock Fireplace. I hate it. My girls think it's beautiful. I wish I would have known that before I started knocking it down last night. Opps.
The rest of it will soon follow...but first that popcorn ceiling has to go...NOW!
Drop clothes- check
Long handle scraper- check
step ladder- check
industrial water sprayer- check
safety glasses- check
dust mask- check
gloves- check
old baseball cap- check
tape- check
spackle- check
room emptied of everything- check
more drop clothes- check!
It's all about the prep.
Let the fun begin!

Rock Wall Project...is coming along. Actually the entire yard is the project. We have so much space...which is good, but a lot of work. We've done more since this photo, but not much. Our next step is top soil, laying in the sprinkler pipes, grass!! and mulch and/or gravel. Not to mention benches and more plants. Will I be done by summer? I better! The back yard is 2 acres of brush...hmmm, how about a mini driving range?

While we're on the subject...

"Wether you turn to the right or to the left, your ears will hear a voice behind you, saying, "This is the way- walk in it."
Isaiah 30:21

"The Next Step in Obedience"

That's what Pastor Kent said. But that is not what finally helped Michael to understand why this thing called "Baptism" is so important to do. Read on...I'll explain.
Michael holds his cross necklace tightly in his hands while praying.

Michael helps Thea.
Sorry- these pictures are out of order. First Michael got dunked, then Thea. Actually 15 people were baptized yesterday. Read on...I'm getting there!

Thea's turn!

If you're saved by faith, why get baptized?

Good question.
For years we didn't know. All anyone could seem to say was that it was an outward expression of obedience to God. Jesus was baptized, he often modeled the life we should lead...to show us the way of rightousness.

Okay- but that still doesn't tell me of why I have to do it.
If I'm saved, then I'm saved. This is a work. Why do it?

Then it clicked! Our pastor, shown above, said this...

"You go down in the water, like Jesus dying on the cross, and raised from your sins, like Jesus being raised from the dead."

It is another step toward commitment. Devoting yourself to Christ. Surrendering your own daily desires for His awesome plan.
Good trade, I say!

Sin...Substitute...Surrender. He took the punishment that should have been mine.
You can't put your face in the light without turning away from the darkness.
I will keep my eyes on Jesus. He will never allow me to be tempted without providing a way out. The Bible says so...and I believe it.


Disclosure Note: The described religion above is not intended to be "forced" upon anyone by the author of this blog, Wavelength. It is simply what Kathy believes to be true. I have my reasons.

The boys

Thea with her boys...Ryan and Matthew. Matthew is the same age as my Megan. Both of them are small and can run VERY fast. They first met each other as soccer team mates. They ran the field and looked at each other as if to say..."oh, I've got some competition this year!"

Chevy's

Girls Night Out!...(and Thea's family)
We went to Chevy's (one of Thea's favorite restaurants). From left to right, clockwise...Thea, Beth, Dena, Paula, Heather, Matthew, Stephanie, Ron, Ryan, Tracy, me, Rachelle.

We held up our margaritas and said "cheese". Rachelle's head in hiding my enormous glass.
As a thank you to all us gals for helping Thea get to therapy and other appts this year, Ron (Thea's husband) paid for our dinner. How nice!
We had a fun time telling stories, jokes and unusual bits of information like..."a good supporting bra will keep your breasts above your elbow". I didn't know that! We all started measuring to see how ours held up.
Thea had lots of great stories because she grew up in Holland. Her dad is full Spanish and her mother is Indoniaian. Her full name is so long I can't even remember it. Instead of walking to school in the snow uphill both ways, her story is...ice skating to the subway to get to school.

Well- you must be so sick of hearing about Thea. Sorry. I just like my friends sooo much. You have no idea how hard it has been for me to make "girl friends". This is nice. So very nice.

I hope they don't talk about me behind my back.

One Year ago on this day...April 8th

After a 5 hour trail ride the unthinkable happened. The horse she was on reared up. Let me just add that Thea is an AVID rider. She knows horses! Thea didn't fall off the horse, she slid off his backside on purpose, knowing something was wrong. She had no way of knowing the horse would also be thrown off balance, landing his 1000 pounds on top of her. She felt no pain and thought her legs where broken.
I know she'll be replaying that one day's events over and over in her mind. One year...you've come a long way, friend! First we'll cry then round out the evening with a margarita!

Therapy

In the driver's seat!

Thea getting out of her new rampvan.

Life goes on

Watch out world! Thea is driving! But of course, I knew that. Tomorrow SHE will drive me to Sac for her Therapy appt. I'm looking forward to it!
This is a tough week for Thea...
This friday marks the one year anniversary of her accident. Sunday marks one year from her surgery. Last year I stood in the hallway...waiting for them to wheel her out so I could see her before she went under the knife.
I cried as she called me by my daughter's name. Katie.
We taped a stone angel to her shoulder...the imprint is still there!
She was lucky. She had a great doctor. He was able to accomplish everything he needed to do from the back in one surgery. Davis doctors would not have preformed the delicate operation that way. They cut everyone from the side.
Anyway- interesting week. I plan to give Thea a card. The front cover shows two young girls sitting together. The inside caption reads..."Real friends stick around for the yucky times, too." I'm not afraid of saying the wrong thing...I'm afraid of NOT saying anything. Acknowledgement. I can give her that.
Enclosed will be several photos that I have taken over the year of her progress. She is smiling in all of them.
What a lady!

On other news...I donated blood yesterday. Went fantastic! I was a bit nervous because last time I took an unexpected nap. This time I was ready...the key to my success? WATER! And lots of it!

Every healthy person should donate. There is NO reason an injured person should die on the operating table because there wasn't enough blood. People talk about what they can do to help others...this one is a no-brainer!
GIVE BLOOD! It doesn't hurt, you baby...just give. GIVE.

Okay- that's enough shaking my finger at you.
You got it.

Blood, brains, guilty or innocent?

A lot on my mind today.

First, there is a blood drive going on in our community today, so I'm stocking up on liquids (water is best) and protein. I haven't been able to give blood for a while...(I was either sick, or out of town).

I've taken a few days off from running (it depletes your body of water and generally wears you down).
I want to be in tip top shape for giving blood.
Why?
Because my blood...that flowing red river rushing through my veins, keeping my heart pumping, giving my lungs breathing power, clotting my cuts, that ingenious miracle liquid...can be put into another person to do the same thing.

Isn't that amazing? It's so personal. The only way I can help you more is to give you my organs. A lung, a liver...a heart.

Why couldn't Terri be given a brain? Do you think that could be possible someday? A brain transplant? There's just one HUGE problem...it wouldn't be Terri anymore. It sounds like Sci-Fi, but I think one day we might see it. If a way can be found to find and remove the section of the brain that controls memory and personal likes/dislikes in the damaged brain...Replacing that section in the donated brain...followed by a successful surgical transplant...
Terri could have woken up (partially) herself?
My logic may have serious flaws. I'm sure any scientist in that field would argue it could never be done. But isn't that what pushes technology on? One of them, anyway.
Personally I think Terri's brain could have been cloned in a medical lab during those 15 years she lay in a vegetative state. I'm not challenging the ethics of the matter- I'm just sayin...I think it could have been done.

Have you heard of "Brain Fingerprinting"?
It's kind of like a lie detector. Except regular polygraphs measure a persons breathing rate, blood pressure, perspiration and pulse. I don't think they are very accurate in their intended use. Finding the truth. Here's why...if you can control your heart rate and nerves (which a lot of people can, especially cold hearted killers) you'll pass. If you get nervous taking tests anyway plus afraid you'll be sent to jail, even though you are innocent, you'll fail.
So, there is this new technology out called brain fingerprinting.
It measures brain wave activity when told information about a crime that only the guilty person would know. Like the polygraph, it bases it's "guilty or not guilty" findings on the person's reaction. Only this one goes to the source (memory), not the symptoms which I don't think can be controlled by the suspect, unless he can block out memories...(opps, snag...people can do that, huh?)

Will it work? I guess we'll see...

There ya go...my thoughts for the day.

My Vacuum Sucks!

Very well, I might add.
Yesterday was one of those days when you just clean like crazy. You see what I'm holding in my hand? That used to be my new scarf. It used to be hanging from a curtain tie back in my bedroom. It's delicate fibers used to barely touch the floor.

Then my vacuum ate it.
Before I could hit the off button it was gone. I checked the bagless canister, but it wasn't there. I reached down and pulled out a few threads from where I thought the motor must be.

Now, I'm known to have a temper sometimes...(stop laughing, MB!)
Really, I was pissed!
Not only did this thing destroy my scarf, but threatened to commit vacuum suicide by death of burned motor! I just bought this thing 6 months ago.

Without hesitation, my husband went for the screwdriver. He knew I was going to take it apart.
I did. Right down to the last screw.
I now have a better understanding of the inner workings of a vacuum cleaner.
I love learning.

Pat me on the back! I fixed it. It was in the compartment of where the motor lives. However, the scarf was not so lucky. Even though it was twisted, knotted and shredded beyond repair...my daughter, Katie, still wanted it. She loves my fashion sense.

I called my dad, like I always do on Sunday, and told him what I did. He laughed and said "Good for you, babe."
My husband said...Never a dull moment with you Kathy!

Bridal Shower

My husband"s sister (Julie) is getting married. Yesterday I went to her bridal shower.

Two hours away, I drove my daughter, my mother-in-law and her sister (aunt Bette) down to Kingdom Koffee in Modesto. Yes, the bridal shower was held at a coffee house. Not the kind of coffeehouse I expected.
I'm used to places like Starbucks and LaBou...this one was different. Locally owned. The first room you step into was small and lined with scented items for sale. After passing a couch you walk into the larger portion of the building. Much larger. White plastic outdoor furniture scattered about and a large plywood stage prominately placed in the corner...obviously they feature live music here.
My daughter (Katie) was thrilled to see a large plasma screen tv on the wall set to her favorite channel (Nickelodeon). We were early. I hadn't eaten much, so I ordered a sandwich. Turkey on wheat bread. Big sandwich...I ended up throwing half of it away. I hate doing that...I wish food could be even distributed to those who need it.

Anyway- I sort of tried to eat it quickly.
Why?
Because I didn't want to be shoving food down my throat when I met her...
Who?
Cassie.
Who's that?
That will be the maid of honor.
But Kathy, why do you care if the maid of honor sees you eating a sandwich?
I just don't want that to be her first impression of me.
I still don't get it, Kathy? Why are you so nervous to meet Cassie?
I'm NOT nervous....it's like this.
I've never met someone who used to date my husband.
Cassie is an old girlfriend of Michaels.
I am curious.

Well- she didn't show up. I sat in a crowded upstairs room with about 25 other women, playing stupid bridal shower games such as "read the brides mind" while trying to explain to several people why I couldn't eat the cheesecake.
"No! It's not lactose intollerance...it's an allergy. I'll throw up if I eat that. NO THANK YOU."
3 hours, YES 3 HOURS, of "OH, THAT IS SO CUTE!"
I've never seen someone take so long to open presents!

2 hours down, 3 hours there, 2 hours back...Good thing I ate that sandwich cause I didn't get home until 8pm. Wiped out. However, my leg pain decided to keep me up most of the night. I found myself going to kitchen at 2am for a bag of frozen broccoli. Guess I won't be running tomorrow. Darn it.
O'well. At least today I can rest. I am happy for that!

Quote

No matter how you feel about the guy, this statement will be remembered.


“The essence of civilization is that the strong have a duty to protect the weak. In cases where there are serious doubts and questions the presumption should be in the favor of life.”
-George Bush

I agree.
originally posted here

The Dream Left Behind...

went to space
touched the moon
scooped it up
my silver spoon

smiling stars
a gracious glide
saturn's rings
on which I slide

hot as the sun
a burning brain
to know it all
fan the flame

atmosphere
lives in here
do not fear
drop a tear

another time
escape inside
where you must go
a quite hide

be with me
can I find
sweet perfect dream
I left behind?